The old married couple

My car has been in the shop. Something about the power steering, and maybe a gasket. Might have been a canister? Maybe a belt? All I know is that my 15 year old vehicle was squealing and it was getting a little embarrassing driving out of the staff parking lot, past the Teslas, BMWs and Mercedes which were most definitely NOT squealing,

So Danny has driven me to work for the past two days. The following are accounts of real conversations:

Wednesday morning…


Me: I’ve been taking the Mission Road exit lately.

Danny: Ok…is that the same as the Southwest Blvd exit?

Me: Uh…yeah, I guess so.

Danny: Then why do you refer to it as the “Mission Road” exit?

Me: Because it’s the Mission Road exit.

Danny: The exit sign clearly lists Southwest Blvd first, before Mission Road.

Me: Well, but you get off on Mission Road.

Danny: Actually, you take Southwest Blvd, NOT Mission Road.

Me: Why don’t you just go ahead and take the Southwest Blvd exit?

Danny: Okay

~ SCENE~

Thursday morning….

Outside temperature is approximately 37 degrees. I am bundled in my winter coat. We have been in the car approximately 4 minutes. Now in the school drop-off lane.

Me: UGH!!! I’m so HOT! Reaches for thermostat and dramatically turns it down from 74 to 68.

Danny: How can you go from 74 to 68, just all of a sudden?

Me: Because I’m HOT!

Danny: Well, you do have your winter coat on.

Me: Because it’s COLD outside!

Danny: Outside is cold. We’re in the car.

Me: I was cold until a second ago, then I was hot.

Danny: So you need your big winter coat for a 15 second walk from your car to the door of the hospital?

Me: taking off coat

~20 minutes later in doctor drop-off lane~

Me: (In an act of marital defiance, displaying impressive quantities of maturity) I’m just going to leave my coat right here and be invigorated by the chill. Leaves coat strewn about on front seat of van with full intention to drive Danny (the neat freak who never leaves ANYTHING in his van) crazy.

~ 9 hours later in doctor pick-up lane ~

Me: Thinking to myself as I wait outside (for an extended period of time) in the cold, gusty wind (sans coat) for Danny to pick me up as the Teslas and BMWs drive past. I wish I had my effing coat!

Well played, my love, well played.

I’m happy to report that my car is finished and I drove my damn self to work today….in my puffy winter coat. And I took the Mission Road exit. And the temperature in my car ranged from a cool and refreshing 68 degrees to a cozy 74 degrees…because that’s how I roll.

Have a wonderful weekend, friends!

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